[ad_1]


AJIBADE OMAPE speaks to Catherine Obute, a 38-year-old mother of two whose nursing and midwifery career came to a halt after she developed lymphedema on her legs
Can you briefly share your early years and education?
My name is Mrs Catherine Obute. I am 38 years old from Benue State; I am Idoma by tribe, and I currently live with my children in Abuja. I was born and brought up in Jos; I had all my education in Jos and lived there until I moved to Abuja in 2012, and I have been in Abuja ever since then.
Living with my family was not the best; I lived in a family where I always had to beg for attention and love; I would occasionally question my birth whenever I saw an uncle I could talk to because as a kid I was not used to speaking up. I come from a family of six; I am the fourth of five children, and we are Catholics. I attended St Paul Anglican Private School in Jos, and after that, I went to Girls’ High School, and three years later when I got to JSS3, there were a lot of issues, and I had a lot of trouble coping with the boarding school life, so my dad had to change the school to a different one.
I went on to continue my secondary school education at Methodist High School, Jos, from the second term in JSS3 until I graduated in 2003, but unfortunately, the same year just after my dad transferred me from Girls’ High School to Methodist High School in 1999, he died; I went to the school of nursing in Plateau State, and after that, I went for midwifery at Our Lady of Apostles School of Midwifery in Jos. I started working a little after I finished nursing school to raise tuition for my midwifery.
My dad had just been promoted to the position of Deputy Superintendent of Police during the (Olusegun) Obasanjo regime and he was supposed to lead his team in Jos on many operations but all of a sudden, he was brought home sick by his boys, who told my mother that they were taking him to the family Hospital called Atlas in Jos; the sickness to us was out of order because my father rarely took ill.
He recovered a bit but things turned bizarre after that; he always wanted people to be happy, and he wanted to visit all his friends; he was unusually generous with his money, he would go out in the morning and come back at night and have conversations with us about the people he went to visit and what happened throughout the day. We got scared, we prayed and my mum had to seek permission to take leave at the office so that she could stay with my dad. As soon as he was rushed to the hospital one day, he died.
In your social media post, you mentioned that your career as a nurse crashed in 2018. What led to that?
While becoming an adult, I experienced complications with my monthly period, I always had painful menstrual cramps and I had to be admitted to a hospital whenever I was having my period. I was scanned in the hospital and I was told that I had an adhesion in my uterus and that it was a result of the way my last delivery was conducted. I felt ill after I came back from a trip in 2014 and I was barely responding to treatment, the doctors at the hospital called a specialist doctor from Abuja who reviewed all my test results and the doctors said I was pregnant but I was not sure because I had been on the move on different trips, a scanner was brought to the room and it was detected that I was 12 weeks pregnant. However, the main reason for the halt in my career was the swelling in my legs that prevented me from being mobile, it affected me to a point where even commercial bike riders would laugh at the weight of my leg, saying that they couldn’t carry such a heavy person. The legs initially grew bigger and eventually impaired my movement from house to work or any other place.
When did you notice the swelling in your legs?
The swelling started with a wound on my left foot. I did not have any previous injuries, but all of a sudden, a boil developed on my leg, and others started forming on my foot the real cause of it was a femoral catheterisation that was done on me on the day of my emergency caesarean section for my second child in 2016; no veins were found and my pregnancy was about 31 weeks old, which was too premature for the baby to be born. I was the head nurse in the hospital at that time and the medical team held a meeting the outcome of it was that there would be a femoral catheterisation done on me so that they could have easy access to my veins and save my life.
I noticed it in 2018, and that was when I stopped going to work. My employer sent me a letter to resign after I took a sick leave and I was not getting better. The doctors did their best and as a result of the pain I was always sedated and I was constantly taking painkillers to the point where I got addicted to them.
Do you blame anybody for your health challenges?
Yes, I would say it’s a mistake; the first scan in 2018 showed that my femoral artery was blocked. I suffered a partial stroke when my husband died in 2017 from an auto crash, so I will blame the mistakes of the doctors, who carried out the femoral catheterisation on me, which led to my femoral artery being blocked. I will also blame myself, because of the state of my health and my addiction to painkillers I was taking, but stopped in 2021 when my mom brought an herbalist to the house to cure me.
The man came three times and with very hot water and leaves to clean my wound and brought out broken bottles, rusted nails, a mirror and hair from my legs. While they did that, my health deteriorated. But the herbs he gave to be poured in my bathing water and some in my wound further infected the wounds. I would say all of that contributed to the deteriorating state of my injury.
Can you tell us about your marital life, husband and family?
I got married in 2015, and my husband was a banker with the defunct Diamond Bank and a marketer. I have two children, both girls aged 20 and seven. My husband had an auto crash when he was on his way to bring his mother to see her grandchild; the mother survived the crash but is currently mentally unstable; my husband didn’t make it, and I was only able to recognise him with his wedding ring because it was customised and my name was on it.
How has your family been faring since your ailment?
It has been very difficult; I have not been working for years. My daughters are currently out of school; my eldest child can’t take the UTME (Unified Tertiary Matriculation Examination) form because I can’t afford the fees. I get help from friends and not too many people. The only family members I have are my two girls. My family on the other hand have been very distant. My doctors are saying they can assist me no matter where I am. But my family, who accuse me of ghosting them because of all these, have called me a liar, a fraud, and a manipulator; my siblings are asking me to return to Jos so that they can take care of me, but I know they are just being hypocritical.
Are your siblings aware of your situation? How have they been supportive?
My siblings are aware of my state of health. I honestly do not like talking about them because of how I feel. I just want to get back on my feet completely and then I can face them. That was the instructions and advice from my therapists and this is because they feel that my constant complaints and bitterness towards them will delay my healing process and drain me mentally.
I can tell you that my siblings are in Abuja here with me, but I last saw them in 2022. I remember that one of my siblings gave me N10,000 to support me; they said that I had been telling people that I asked for money things about the family and that I was only doing it to tarnish their reputation, all these allegations because I got a sponsor for my surgery and my sponsor, who happens to be my sister’s ex wanted to be anonymous, I feel that is just wickedness; my doctors are saying the same; prayer houses are telling me to stay away from them too; I just want to be back on my feet and have my career back. My friends have been the ones helping me financially, alongside some of my nursing school colleagues who would contribute some cash for me, although at a time my former colleagues said I was scamming them.
Have you faced any form of discrimination due to your condition?
To be honest, yes I have faced a lot of discrimination, and it did not just start now; it started way before I came to Abuja when my legs were just beginning to swell up. I have faced discrimination at my workplace, and in the marketplace, even okada riders laugh at me saying that they cannot convey me on their bikes because of the size of my legs; the stigma has been too much; I wish to get back on my feet and get my life back.
How many surgeries have you done so far?
I had surgery on my right leg and I am lucky that it went well. Just like I said earlier, it was sponsored by my sister’s ex who insisted on seeing me after several attempts to see me were frustrated by my sister.
How has your condition affected you mentally?
Yes it has, I have tried to commit suicide severally, but it’s hard to think that my children will suffer if I leave them in this wicked world. I have faced discrimination almost everywhere; my siblings act like I am okay whereas my condition is very bad.
How have you been getting support?
I’m trying, but not many people know what is going on with me because I am someone who barely tells people what is wrong with me. My friends try their best and I know everyone has one problem or the other; since my husband died it’s just been me and the girls. The only major support I got came from my sister’s ex who was shocked when he saw the state that my children and I were in.
What goals do you have for the future considering your health challenges and experiences?
I wish to start all over, I wish to start creating awareness for people living with lymphedema (lymphedema is a long-term chronic condition that causes swelling in the body’s tissues. It can affect any part of the body but usually develops in the arms or legs. It develops when the lymphatic system does not work properly), and If possible start a foundation. I want to be a role model to a lot of people, including my kids, My kids don’t deserve what they are going through because of the state of my health; I want them to attain success and reach greater heights that will make them forget what they went through. Although for now, while I wait for my wounds to completely heal and I get strong enough to go back to work, I will want to start a baking business. I love cooking, baking, and braiding hair, and I’m very good at them. At least it will put a small quantity of food on our table.
Do you still want to go back into nursing and midwifery?
Yes, that’s my passion and I’m very good at my job, I miss it a lot, and the last job that I managed to get despite the low pay was three years ago, But I don’t see that as me practicing at all, because of how I was treated, and how I wasn’t given some opportunities.
What support do you need?
I want to get back on my feet. I want to achieve total wellness, and to achieve that I need a home, and sterile dressing materials (to be able to dress my wounds regularly) because they taught my daughter how to dress the wounds, so we do it together. I need a good diet to ensure that my muscles come back, and lastly, I need to start up something small. All these will bring me back on my feet again, and in that way, I’ll be able to go back to work and start taking care of my responsibilities as a mother.

[ad_2]